The Anger Canvas unleashed a whole lotta emotion that had been pent up inside for WAY too long. Each time my brush touched the canvas, I let more and more go. It felt so good that I went on to another canvas. Rather than the extreme emotion of the first, this seemed to be more a dance of anger. There was a rhythm and balance to it all. Just getting it out was the important thing. Not worrying about anything but pure uncensored expression.
Whew. Huge deep breathe. NOW I can paint. The release triggered a breakthrough whereupon I am feeling the floodgates opening. I am struck by the similarity in gesture this painting has with my weavings. There is a constant thread running through our lives if we but stop to observe.
Here is an under-painting of my beloved mountain. Nothing like a solid foundational landmass speaking of strength and beauty to get me started again. The landscape in the south of France is decidedly feminine. That’s mostly why I felt so at home there. And though my mountain here is rugged, I feel her emanating a strong feminine energy as well.
This weekend in the high desert was the ShaktiFest: A Celebration of the Divine Mother. Though I was not able to go, I pursued the website with interest. Another flood of emotion washed through me: memories of my time in India where the divine feminine has been honored and respected for centuries. And suddenly it all came together for me. Again I ask, how did I stray so far away from my path? It was there all along, the underlying currents that make up my life. And I chose to ignore them…until now.
In this painting done many years ago, I capture the notion of surrender. And that is where I am again. Surrendering to what is before me, what is here now, what I’ve come here to be and do.
I surrender to truth, beauty, freedom and love. I surrender to it all so that I may naturally and completely embrace my own divine life.